Sunday, April 09, 2006
Figuring it out
It is time for me to diet. I have to. My heart pounds, I'm fat, I can't breathe (smoking and weight probably) and I feel miserable.
Two years ago I lost 90 pounds and gained them all back. Every last one. So I have to do that again and this time stick with a healthy lifestyle after the loss.
I'm trying to figure out what in the hell to do this time. I think I will do Weight Watchers again because I ate a healthful diet and it wasn't so bad. When it's done, though, I need to prepare myself for the lifetime maintenance.
The reason I freaked out and fell off my plan was son/public school related. It was stress. Mother's stress and worry over a child. Pretty strong.
Fat is an insulator. It keeps people at bay.
Fat sucks. I hate being the way I am. It's uncomfortable.
On a good note, I'm to the point where I don't give a shit what anyone thinks of me. I have noticed a little fat discrimination in the last month, where before I was oblivious to it. But too bad for them. This is who I am, like me or not. I happen to be a very kind person. However, I am unhealthy and it's time to start a journey.
This week I'm cleaning out the kitchen, searching for recipes and doing a little more research. I'll start in a week or so.
I'm not sharing my weight. Obviously I have 90 to lose, so I'm big. But no numbers. That's personal. I will share my thoughts on this journey. Hopefully I'll figure out how to deal with stress and life's bumps in the roads.
Two years ago I lost 90 pounds and gained them all back. Every last one. So I have to do that again and this time stick with a healthy lifestyle after the loss.
I'm trying to figure out what in the hell to do this time. I think I will do Weight Watchers again because I ate a healthful diet and it wasn't so bad. When it's done, though, I need to prepare myself for the lifetime maintenance.
The reason I freaked out and fell off my plan was son/public school related. It was stress. Mother's stress and worry over a child. Pretty strong.
Fat is an insulator. It keeps people at bay.
Fat sucks. I hate being the way I am. It's uncomfortable.
On a good note, I'm to the point where I don't give a shit what anyone thinks of me. I have noticed a little fat discrimination in the last month, where before I was oblivious to it. But too bad for them. This is who I am, like me or not. I happen to be a very kind person. However, I am unhealthy and it's time to start a journey.
This week I'm cleaning out the kitchen, searching for recipes and doing a little more research. I'll start in a week or so.
I'm not sharing my weight. Obviously I have 90 to lose, so I'm big. But no numbers. That's personal. I will share my thoughts on this journey. Hopefully I'll figure out how to deal with stress and life's bumps in the roads.
// posted by Frankie @ 9:37 PM 
